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Love + Relationships

Platonic and romantic


The Unbearable Lightness of Not Being Yourself

The Unbearable Lightness of Not Being Yourself

How I Stopped Being Myself Long Enough to Get Better

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+8

A Field Guide to Spotting Manipulation in Real Time

A Field Guide to Spotting Manipulation in Real Time

Crib sheet for the road

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+7

What We Mourn When We Mourn a Celebrity

What We Mourn When We Mourn a Celebrity

On Tom Lehrer, Malcolm-Jamal Warner, and collapsed space.

Concepts

+6

On Becoming a Person

On Becoming a Person

Carl Rogers on the painful gap between our true selves and performed selves

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+6

The Unspoken Grammar of Love

The Unspoken Grammar of Love

The Subtle Patterns That Predict Divorce—According to the Psychologist Who Can Foresee It with 93.6% Accuracy

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+5

The Unbearable Lightness of Being Disliked

The Unbearable Lightness of Being Disliked

How Alfred Adler’s Individual Psychology Explains the Modern Self

Concepts

+5

Notes & Thoughts: The New York Times 1st Well Festival

Notes & Thoughts: The New York Times 1st Well Festival

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+12

The Politics of Being Alone: The Systemic Bias Against Singles.

The Politics of Being Alone: The Systemic Bias Against Singles.

When One is the Loneliest Number

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+5

The Vigilant Heart: Hypervigilance and Emotional Exhaustion

The Vigilant Heart: Hypervigilance and Emotional Exhaustion

What neuroscience and attachment theory teach us about the exhausting vigilance that keeps love at bay

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+7

The Beautiful Trap: How Limerence Warps Perception and Fuels Obsession

The Beautiful Trap: How Limerence Warps Perception and Fuels Obsession

The intrusive and inescapable high that isn't love, at all.

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+7

The True Story of My Fake Ex-Husband

The True Story of My Fake Ex-Husband

In the late 1990s, I met a stranger on the subway, and (illegally) married him a few hours later.

Systems

+2

Parents & Couples Respond to Last Week's "Single & Excluded" Newsletter.

Parents & Couples Respond to Last Week's "Single & Excluded" Newsletter.

Systems

+4

On Loneliness and Exclusion: The Hidden Architecture of the Single Life

On Loneliness and Exclusion: The Hidden Architecture of the Single Life

When One is the Loneliest Number

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+4

Things Worth Sharing: What I'm Reading, Watching & Thinking About

Things Worth Sharing: What I'm Reading, Watching & Thinking About

Current doings at Stern Enterprises

Small Delights

+4

The Loneliness Cure: Dr. Ruth’s Practical Wisdom for Connection

The Loneliness Cure: Dr. Ruth’s Practical Wisdom for Connection

The Secret of Connection from New York’s Loneliness Ambassador

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+8

BONUS POST: My Lifelong 'Childhood Disorder.'

BONUS POST: My Lifelong 'Childhood Disorder.'

The Thing That Didn't Leave.

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+5

Why Saying “I Love You” Is Not Enough.

Why Saying “I Love You” Is Not Enough.

And what to say instead.

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+5

If You’re Trying to Avoid Reality, How Can You Face Your Life?

If You’re Trying to Avoid Reality, How Can You Face Your Life?

James Baldwin in Two Little Known Gems.

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+5

Don't Know Who You Are? These Games Can Help.

Don't Know Who You Are? These Games Can Help.

Learning Yourself Through Play.

Concepts

+2

What Looks Like a Crush but Feels Like Obsession? Limerence.

What Looks Like a Crush but Feels Like Obsession? Limerence.

Dorothy Tennov on Love and Limerence

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+4

The Vigilant Heart: Hypervigilance and Emotional Exhaustion

The Vigilant Heart: Hypervigilance and Emotional Exhaustion

What neuroscience and attachment theory teach us about the exhausting vigilance that keeps love at bay

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+6

What Elmo Can Teach Us About Being Better Strangers

What Elmo Can Teach Us About Being Better Strangers

How one small question made a huge impact

Tools & Practices

+3

This Is To Mother You: The Life and Death of Sinead O’ Connor

This Is To Mother You: The Life and Death of Sinead O’ Connor

Our Problem With "Unlikable" Characters

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+2

The End of Therapy

The End of Therapy

How to Know When You Are Done.

Systems

+2

The True Story of My Teenage Fight Club

The True Story of My Teenage Fight Club

An excerpt by Isaac Fitzgerald

Maladaptive Responses & Behaviors

+3

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